Had Nothing To Do So…Here

y’know…sometimes I think I’m a pretty lousy friend…that my personality is such that I just suck at the whole thing…I always look at the worst case scenario…I’m naturally a loner, cynical & suspicious of people…at times I give people the benefit of the doubt but I don’t really believe in them…damned hypocritical isn’t it?there are times when I rather dislike hope although I recognise its sheer power as well…I mean…most of the time people are going to screw you over one way or the other so why hope for the best?expect the worst, work from there, prepare contingencies & then go out & smile at them…what kind of a person does that?I know this is wrong…that to think like this is horribly self-defeatist but sometimes…god…I wish I wasn’t such a pragmatist…having said that I feel impelled to point out that I have met several exceptions to the rule & that my brain is rather foggy from lack of sleep right now but…I wish I could be more of a bitch…unfortunately…call it a boon or a curse…I can always see things from the other’s point of view…sometimes it might take me a bit longer to do so but eventually I do get there in which case I can’t really stay angry & frustrated…I just try to figure stuff out ASAP so that it can be done & over with…not to say I’m a damned saint…I just get over the urge to shoot people with a sniper fairly quickly…I once read of this witch who found a novel way of punishing those who offended her…she found it much more expedient to make people think they were frogs instead of all the hassle of actually turning them into one…talk ’bout a novel approach*sardonic grin*I’m in a strange mood today & this’ll probably blow over within the next half hour or so…funny…the thoughts that cross my mind when I’m overworked & deprived of sleep*sigh*

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